Happily Amber After

Monday, 9th August 2004

I wanted to hang out with Farah today, but I couldn’t find her. In fact, I couldn’t find anyone at recess or lunch except for Amy. And she was totally sad, so I was basically at square one with the whole comforting thing.

Fun.

Not.

It wasn’t until after school that I spoke to Britt while we were waiting for dad to come home so he could take us to netball that I found out some interesting stuff. And it’s made me seriously doubt how much Mercy ‘hates’ Farah.

“Mercy knows she needs to apologise to Farah, but she won’t,” Britt said as she flopped onto the couch.

“Why not?”

“Because it’s Mercy we’re talking about,” Britt let out a small laugh, “She doesn’t like to admit she’s wrong.”

Yup. That was Mercy in a nutshell. She was so right.

“Well, at least she knows she was being a bitch,” I said, not afraid to hold back, “It was just weird. Mercy is pretty good at picking up on boundaries, you know? Is there something going on with her?”

Britt hesitated, “No. Not exactly…”

I leaned forward, “Nah, you have to tell me now. I swear I won’t say anything.”

“…I think she’s just a little bit insecure at the moment…” Britt said slowly.

“Because of Farah?” I questioned further.

Britt avoided my gaze, “In the beginning, yes. But I don’t think it’s about that anymore.”

“So what’s it about then?”

“I can’t say-“

“Why not?”

“Because-“

“Because what?”

“I DON’T KNOW!”

Whoa.

I made Britt explode.

She went bright red and glared at me. Wow. I must’ve really pushed her to the edge.

Oops.

“Sorry,” I said quietly.

Britt sighed, “No, I’m sorry. You’re not the only one that thinks she’s been, you know… weird. I have been trying so hard to find out what’s going on with her but she keeps pushing me away.”

I blinked a couple of time, “Really? That’s not like her at all.”

“I know. To be honest, she’s been acting pretty weird since she broke up with Demarco.”

Demarco? What the hell? That was like, ages ago!

“Seriously?” I asked in shock.

Britt nodded, “Yeah. It wasn’t obvious at first. It was just tiny things, like she didn’t call me back right away, or she’d take longer to reply to me, but it’s gotten worse. Sometimes, she doesn’t even bother replying to me at all. And like, I’ll ask her at school and she just gives me all these excuses. I thought I was getting on her nerves, but then she started picking fights with people like you and Farah and now she’s not really talking to me at all. It’s just so general and… boring. She’s not herself anymore.”

I was trying so hard to process everyone that Britt said, but I couldn’t think straight.

Seriously? Since Demarco?

What the fuck did the guy do to her?

“Are you sure it started happening once she broke up with Demarco?” I asked once more time with pure seriousness in my voice.

“Well, I think it’s been since the break up, yeah,” Britt said slowly, “But maybe it’s something else. I dunno. Why doesn’t she want to talk to me anymore?”

Then she started crying.

Fuck.

I sat down next to Britt and gave her a big hug. I realised that this really wasn’t about me or Farah anymore. It was about Mercy, and how she had changed in such a short period of time. She is affecting everyone around her, and she has no freaking clue! And I can’t believe how she’s treating Britt. Like, she won’t even give her an explanation! And Britt is meant to be her best friend…

I have half a mind to ask her what’s going on, but I don’t want to cause anymore fighting. It seems like Mercy is pretty unstable at the moment, and anything could throw off her mood. I really want to talk to the other girls about it and see if they know anything.

I don’t think our group can survive another fight. Especially if it’s as bad as the one Mercy and Farah had last week.

I really wish my friends were normal.

Ugh.

Amber A.

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